First family wedding
Thought I'd update about my niece Kayleigh's wedding to Dean.
It's the first family wedding that I've been to since losing Rebecca and the thought of it was so mixed and emotional. I was very much looking forward to it because it was my lovely niece Kayleigh who was getting married and she and Dean are so happy and in love, it was the next natural step in their life. But, it was going to be difficult for three reasons, 1) It was the same weekend Rebecca should have married Richard and enjoyed all the wonderful things she'd planned 2) Having to deal with the knowledge that me and Paul won't ever get the chance to be parents of our lovely daughter as a bride in the setting she'd planned and 3) My wonderful Dad wasn't going to be there either.
In the end even though I faced it with apprehension It was an absolutely lovely day in a beautiful setting and although I shed some tears, (as did others) it was a most enjoyable day.
Kayleigh looked absolutely beautiful in her wedding dress and seeing my brother Rob walk her to the alter brimming with pride was special. Watching this was a bit difficult but I was also filled with pride for them both.
The wedding ceremony took place in a folly on the edge of a lake watched by family and friends and the weather was thankfully beautiful.
I wasn't on my own missing special people, my Mum was and so was Kayleigh's Granddad Ted.
Mum and Ted were sat together without my Dad and Vera watching Kayleigh get married and it occurred to me how sad they must both have felt as well and sometimes realisation like that can put things in perspective.
Even though I wish things could have been different, they're not and in my heart I know Rebecca and my Dad as well as Vera will have been there with us, watching, smiling and enjoying the day.
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| Rob walking Kayleigh to Dean |
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| Rob and Dean's best man and Brogan speaking about marriage |
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| The happy couple, now Mr and Mrs Hepworth |
We went on to have plenty to eat drink and made merry as well as accidents and it was great to meet up with the girls from the hen do.
I really did have a lot to drink I actually smoked 4 cigs that night, something I haven't done for 10 years or more. Not had any since though and no yearning to have any thank god!! Such a bad habit.
I then went on to fracture my collar bone sometime in the early hours of Monday morning and got up feeling like shit with a hangover from hell. Was sick in the car park of the posh hotel, then at the top of my Mum's street and have had a sling on my shoulder since. (Wonder if that's payback from Rebecca for having those ciggies, she'd be as mad as hell about that :) .)
It was a brilliant day though and accidents and hangovers aside, I wouldn't have missed it for the world.
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| Morning after - not a good sight haha |
The next time I post I might speak about Rebecca's wedding if I can, it's not something I've spoken about much. People never ask about it probably scared it might upset me, might do me good.
This blog is my way of dealing with losing my precious daughter and helps to talk about how things affect me, so as always thank you for being interested and taking the time to read.
Cheerio for now x
